Monday, July 12, 2010

I am in love.

Meet Maddie.
Under 2 lbs of fuzzy cuteness. Cuddling her, playing with her, even getting up and making her food in the middle of the night (she has to be fed every 4 hours right now, because she's so teeny) makes my heart feel like it's going to burst.
I am sure it's a different experience to those who have actually experienced it, but this is what I imagine having a baby is like. I imagine this as I will never have the opportunity to have a human baby, which bothers me more some days than other days... but the pure, heavy, unconditional love that I feel for this little girl when she crawls into the crook of my neck and falls asleep or even when she smears poop all over the floor in valiant attempts at the litter box just makes me feel AMAZING.
I L O V E her. HARD. So hard. Already. (It's been 2 days with her).
She is exactly what I needed right now. EXACTLY. Things have not been good for me. In me, whatever. She helps.
She helps me remember what it's like to feel happy, to feel like I have purpose, to feel love, why life is worth it, even the yucky parts, like saying goodbye to those that have passed. It's all worth it, because little miracles like Maddie are out there, just waiting for me to discover them.


  1. It's almost EXACTLY what having a child is like. Just so you know... and, she's totally adorable!

  2. You mean our pets aren't our children? I really believe that our pets have amazing abilities in helping us heal and they love you back unconditionally too! She is so cute and is so blessed to have you as her Mom!

    Thinking of you in your time of loss...

  3. Sarafina, she is a beauty! I have a friend who saved a litter of kittens and their mother. she has been nursing them in her home. Her life right now hasn't been going so great and she echoed what you said..."this is exactly what I whole family needed these babies to love." Kittens are God's special gift to us I think.