Sunday, April 20, 2008

Civic Duty can kiss my tired ass.

So, I was voted a delegate for the 49th LD for my Man Barack Obama. Dave was an alternate, but yet again the Cow did not show up for her visitation, and so at the last minute he stayed home due to lack of child care. The "good" news is that the biznatch is in the hospital. We're guessing the mental ward again, as they are being vague as to why, instead of whining about her medical problems to try to get us to feel sorry for her. I would imagine our marriage and house-buying is what shoved her ass over the edge again, as anything good that happens to Dave ends up doing this.

Anyway. I had to be there at 7:30 to check in. One cool thing was the Obama people decided to send out an email to the people linked in to and have a food drive - by the time I got there to donate my few cans there were already 15 boxes! So that was excellent.
I stood in a very long line to get my badge, then another line for my ballot and booklet, and then went into the auditorium to sit. While I was there I saw Jori's 2nd grade teacher, a friend of Winter's mom, and our attorney! HAHA. You know you are old when the people you know have to do with your kids and not shows you went to etc.

Since voter turn out was huge everywhere, there were 5 Legislative Districts that met (it was LD and County combined, which was the first mistake they made) there were over 3000 delegates and alternates. We began to get behind schedule instantly, due to them severely underestimating the amount of time it would take to do anything with that volume of people. The agenda stated we were to get out at 1, no later, due to Passover.

To make a long bitching rant short, there was zero organization, you couldn't hear jackshit when they split us into groups, our LD had to move TWICE, and myself and a few other ladies took it upon ourselves to get the elderly members of our group situated, and it was BS that people with canes, crutches, wheelchairs etc had to be trekked up and down stairs and wooden bleachers. The process to elect state delegates was a total cluster, it was hot, we were starving and thirsty (with no food/drink allowed or even planned for in there) and by the time we got done electing delegates for the next level it was 1:30 - we hadn't even gotten to the resolutions (which there were like 15 of that we had to vote on - and it was good shit, like calling for impeachment of Bush/Cheney). I had a massive headache.

As soon as I turned in my ballot at 1:30 I had had it, I was about to go homicidal, so I bailed on the resolutions and took off. I wasn't the only one. I read this morning that so many people left that someone blew the whistle on quorum (i/e not enough voters there to make it a "real" vote) and so the resolutions didn't get passed! Which blows, but seriously, what did they think? We would sit there until 4 with no food or drink?

This was my first LD caucus, and I talked to people who were old school, and they said that this one was a bunch of crap, and they were shocked at how it all went down. I certainly won't volunteer for this again, which is sad, because I am a political diehard, and I know that if I won't volunteer, there are tons of other people that won't. Granted I've never loved a Prez candidate like I love Barack, but yeah. It was a nightmare.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Honeymoon in Vegas.

So Vegas was super kick ass. I think I responded to everyone that left wedding well-wishes. If not, it's not that I don't love you, it wasn't intentional, and I still love you.

The day of the wedding was major chaos. Despite our waking up at the ass crack of dawn (4am) it was a close call getting there - security at PDX blew, and we had to practically run to make flight 1. For some retarded-ass reason we had to fly to Seattle and then to Vegas. At this point neither Dave nor I had eaten. If you've never been around Dave when he's not eaten consider yourself lucky. Mr. Mellow turns into Mr. Crabby Bitchass. Seriously, it's Jekyll/Hyde. So I got to listen to that for an hour and a half. Landed in Seattle and had to book ass again, but at least managed to grab some overpriced breakfast foods before boarding.

Got into Vegas on time, and had to wait FOREVER to stand in the rental car line. At this point Mr. Hyde was hungry again, and I wanted to choke him by the time we got to the restaurant. Instead I made him take me to the Outlet mall down the road, told him to get a massage from the place there, and get a coffee for god's sake. Then he was back to his old self.

We went to the hotel - I read on message boards that if you slip the desk clerk a $20 and ask for an upgrade you get it. Well, that tish works, so we got a kick ass renovated room on the 25th floor. At this point we were snacky, and needed to kill some time so we got some seriously awesome pastries from JJ's Boulangerie and ate them.

About an hour before the limo came to pick us up I had a major meltdown (payback for Mr. Hyde? HAHA) and freaked the hell out - I decided it was some bizarre version of cold feet that made no sense, and me freaking out over not wanting people to look at me, cause being all dressed up and walking through the hotel everyone talks to you and looks at you. Dave talked me off the ledge and we were off.

The chapel was pretty ghetto, which cracked us up, because we thought we were getting LESS ghetto than the drive thru. They made me hold these god awful fake flowers in some of the pictures, I flat out refused to carry them down the aisle. I also refused to walk down while Dave stared at me, and made him walk with me. I also told them ahead of time to leave the "obey" shit out, cause there was no way in hell I was obeying anyone. LMAO

The pastor said some sappy shit that made me all emotional, and then when he asked him "Dave, do you take this woman to be your wife, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health" blah blah he answered "I do, forever and ever." At this point I start crying like a wussy, and choke out my vows which make Dave cry like a wussy. He started it. Bastard.

Then we posed for a bunch of stupid ass photos that we knew we were gonna laugh at, and I bartered with the white trash chapel owner that tried to sell me them for $700. Ha. Joke. I went through and picked out about 20 of the 115 I actually wanted and told her I was on a budget, I only budgeted $300. Then magically the price fell to $550, then $500, and then $400, as "low as the company would allow her." I knew this was bullshit, but making sure I got the release to them I agreed to $400 and got them all on CD, in all their cheesy glory.

Then we took the limo back to the hotel, I got out of that damn merengue dress ASAP and into jeans and we went and ate at Les Artistes Steakhouse. I ordered the small cut of prime rib which was 16 oz - and I ate the whole damn thing. Hell yeah. We had super good masked potatoes with garlic and brie and mushroom. *drool*.

We wandered some casinos, gambled a little, and ended up in bed around 2.

The next two days we wandered the strip from end to end, only missing a few casinos we didn't care about. And then on day two was TOM JONES.

This is definitely one of the best shows EVER. If you haven't seen a geriatric old man air humping nothing and grabbing his crotch while he sings dirty songs to old ladies in the front row (and a few young ones - he winked at me at one point - hahaha YES!!!) you haven't lived. He played all the hits, and I laughed so hard I was bawling at one point, and trying to hide my face, because Tom Jones didn't need to see me laughing at him. Seriously though - the old man looks a mess, and moves a mess, but he can still sing like you wouldn't believe.

The flight back sucked - was major late, we got in at like 2 am, we were mega sore and bitchy, and it took us all weekend to try to reacclimate. Last night I went to bed at 8pm and slept all night and today felt relatively normal. Las Vegas will KICK YOUR ASS, people.